Book Review - Trusting God through Tears

 

As you may know I am the librarian for our church library, and I come across a lot of titles while I am inputting into the library. If you ever have a chance, you really ought to come and have a look, our library is growing by leaps and bounds.

While working on a pile of new titles last week I came across this little gem. It's entitled "Trusting God Through Tears" by Jehu Thomas Burton. At first I thought, ok, here's another little grief counseling book, and thought to get it processed without looking too much at it, as I have frankly had my fill of grief counseling books that don't even scratch the surface. Most of them are written by doctors or the like who have never had to cope with the loss of a loved one, nevertheless think they understand other people's grief and despair. But this little book caught my eye as I was sticking the bar code on the back cover.

Jehu and his wife woke one morning in 1991 to find their 12 year old son Kelly dead in his bed as a result of a cerebral hemorrhage. This tragic event changed and shaped them as no other event ever could. Mr. Barton journals those changes and his journey through devastating and debilitating grief.

While I found much of the book very difficult to read without shedding many, many tears, I was comforted and encouraged by Jehu's journey and his thought processes. Having said that, there are a few things in the book that jarred a little. He spent a great deal of time trying to fathom the why's of his sons death. He comes to the conclusion that he may never know why God sent his family this difficult trial, however he acknowledges that one reason may be to drive him and his family to the cross on Christ on their knees. He states that God intends to allow his children to suffer to drive them closer to Him, to seek His comfort and peace.  He tries to prove that God uses terrible trials to bend His people to His will.

The author doesn't really allow that the death of a loved one may not be for that purpose at all. I know from experience that my husband and I trusted God implicitly throughout John's illness and death in 2009. Every day we prayed together for His grace to get us through those days and comfort and lead us. I don't believe we were ever closer to God as in those life-altering months.

So I don't believe that God uses trials necessarily to drive people closer to Him. But I do believe that He teaches people that even though their lives are turned upside down, He will be there, succoring and giving peace. His will prevails, and throughout events in our lives He never sends us more than we can bear, even though sometimes it sure seems we cannot bear the pain.

I also don't believe as the author seems to, that God's will is cause and effect, i.e. if you need to learn humility, He will send a trial that teaches humility, or if you need to learn patience He will send a lesson that teaches patience. He will send lessons to everyone who loves Him, to teach them to trust Him with all their heart and soul. That is a lesson every Christian needs to learn. And perhaps some people will receive specific trials, but God does not think the way we do, in chastising us to correct specific sins. He sees the deeper issues (depravity) that need to be addressed, and desires that we learn at His knees, but not always with pain and suffering.

I believe firmly (and the author does acknowledge this as well) that Christians must, above all, learn to accept God's sovereignty over our lives, indeed, over all of life. We have not a shred of control over our lives or the events in it. And with that lesson does come peace and acceptance. Generally, I would highly recommend this little book. It is a stellar glimpse into one man's journey through pain and despair and how he used his grief to help others try to understand God's love.

Thea

Reading Lolita in Tehran Review

I confess I do not remember a lot of the discussion, as unbeknownst to me I was coming down with the 24 hour 'flu. Just in case one of you come down with it, you'll know who to blame... sorry!

From what I do remember:

1. Most of us found it a hard book to get into, and the reviews were mixed as to whether we enjoyed it or not. The ones who did not enjoy it found the long book analogies tedious, especially if we were unfamiliar with the title in question. Those who did enjoy the book were more familiar with some of the titles she discussed and found her analysis of the books spot on.

2. We did, for the most part find the sections about the Islamic Revlution interesting, although we all confessed we had a hard time remembering all the characters and their names.

3. We had a long discussion about the "chador" or veil. We found it interesting that the very thing the chador was designed to prevent, i.e. lust, caused it in the minds of the male population.

4. We decided that the "magician" was only an acquaintance/friend whom Prof. Aziz sought out from whom to receive advice and counsel. She used the label magician to ensure his anonymity. It was he who pointed out to her that the very thing she was trying to avoid, namely, getting involved with the politics of the day, was what was consuming her.

Did I miss anything?

Questionaire - Thea

Looks like I am!! I got a copy of "The Secret Daughter" and the double Charles Dickens book.


2. I am reading Edward Rutherford`s "New York" and "Reading Lolita in Tehran" at the same time.

3. The last book I lent out was John Grisham`s "The Confession" (yawn)and Jan Guillou's first book in his Crusades Trilogy - "The Road to Jerusalem".

4. Bernard Cornwell "The Burning Land", Ken Follett's "Fall of Giants", the Dickens Omnibus, haven't thought any further than that!

5. I really enjoy Edward Rutherford, although his style is predictable. He starts off telling the story of a place, how it was established, as well as the whys and wherefores. He begins with a few key people/families, and throughout his epic tomes, progeny from these families keep coming forward. It's an interesting style, as sometimes you lose track of any given character and somehow he always manages to tell their story, even if it's in the most unexpected or underhanded way.

Historical figures come to life in his books. Right now, in "New York" the characters of George Washington and Abraham Lincoln come to life, and you learn things about these men that are not well known. He re-frames historical events in a fictional way, embellishing and fleshing the stories out to build interest. In an entertaining way the author teaches you historical events, yet the entire story is knit together.

Rutherford's characters are believable and human. They make mistakes, do reprehensible deeds, feel pain and joy, and are drawn into intrigue and drama. And throughout the book, the place in questions is explained and developed.

I never hesitate when I see a new Rutherford novel published. I buy them immediately

Hosptality Questionnaire - Thea

1. How often do you have company in your home (per week/month/year)?

I have two answers for every question, before and since. Because my home has definitely changed in the last 8 months. Everything changed, and so did my entertaining habits.

Before, we used to entertain at least once or twice per month. We would have family or friends over for coffee, or an evening including dinner, conversation and even games. 

Since, entertaining has definitely happened more like once every two or three months. Of course when we're talking family members, it's more like twice a week. There has been a lot of changes happening in my home, renos and building etc. so once the dust has settled, I'm hoping to open my home up a little more often.

2. What do you enjoy about hosting? What do you dislike?

Before - conversation, getting to know people better, relaxing and enjoying and laughing. Preparing good food and fancy drinks. Getting out my fine china and using it.

Since - hard to say. When I had book club, I really enjoyed the conversation, but I was more nervous about making sure everything was looking great.

3. Name 2 things that you do for company/before company arrives, that you rarely/never do otherwise.

I make lists to ensure I don't forget anything, and I also get everything ready during the day before the arrival time, and make sure everything is timed correctly. I never do that on a regular basis.

4. What is on your "last-minute check list" right before the door bell rings?

Everything is shining, ready and in it's place, and all the tea lights/candles are lit if it's an evening affair. I clean too, but I'm not obsessive about it.

5.What is your favorite "event" to host? ( for example: coffee, a meal, evening, over-nightter, family/friends, outdoor/indoor, casual/formal... etc)

A fun Christmas party. When people dress up, come out, act all sophisticated and go home full of good food, wonderful wine/drinks and a glow because they enjoyed themselves so much. I (used to) adore that time of year. Hopefully that will return someday and my Christmas parties will once again be the "event of the year"!

"Gesuntheit" by Patch Adams: Discussion Review

There was a very good turnout for the first book club meeting of the year at Thea’s home. Unfortunately, our member bearing the main dish was a little off course, so over a glass of wine for those who enjoy wine, we discussed the book list for 2010. You will find the results of that discussion elsewhere.

After Sherrie arrived and the meal was prepared, we sat down around a lovely dinner table, shared a delicious meal and discussed the book Gesuntheit by Patch Adams. The following points were made:

• Although the entire book discusses the value of humour and silliness within the practice of medicine, we were of the opinion that respect both of patient and doctor were of value. We agreed that we perhaps would not like a touchy-feely type of doctor. Perhaps we are too conditioned by our society, but we felt respect and dignity go a long ways to feeling comfortable with our medical professionals.

• We agreed that for the most part our general practitioners cared about their patients and when the occasion warranted took the time to spend with us to ensure they understand our issues.

• We agreed that our socialized system of medicine was not exactly the same as the system in the US, and that perhaps our system even more than in the US operated like a business rather than proper care for the patient as a patient. For every incident we could see that the business of medicine was cruel and unusual, we did however see incidents where the system worked reasonably well. The largest issue we do not need to be concerned with is health care for the affluent only, however (as an afterthought) we do experience a two tier system of sorts in Canada.

• It is notable that Dr. Adams was not ultimately successful in establishing his silly hospital, due to funding issues. We ascertained this meant that society did not really buy into his ideal, or perhaps that he underestimated the cost of building, outfitting and operating a hospital, based on the incredible idea of not charging for services rendered.

• We also noted with sadness that his marriage was offered on the altar of silliness (Probably more truthful to say that he was rarely at home with his wife, but the altar stuff sounds better!)

• We also discussed some discrepancies between the movie and the book, with no conclusion whether the movie was a truthful version of the book.

Many of us found it a difficult read, excepting those who had recent experience with the medical community or worked in the field of medicine. We did agree however that there is a prevalent trend towards “dehumanizing” medicine, generally speaking.

Thea's Address

Sorry for forgetting to give you driving instructions!
My address is:
9 Shannon Street
York ON N0A 1R0
telephone 905-765-7922

Here is a map link

First 2010 Club Meeting -- Reminder!!

Our next meeting is scheduled for Thursday January 21, 2010 at Thea's house, starting at 7.30 p.m.

We hope to discuss Patch Adams' "Gesundheit". The question and answers were published in a previous post. The menu looks like this:

Menu: "Good for the Body and Soul"

whole wheat fettuccine with chicken and broccoli rabe - Sherrie

spinach salad - Tessa

tiramisu - Theresa

Thea will provide, coffee, tea, juice or some kick-a-poo joy juice that is deemed by Scripture to be "good for the stomach"! So that makes it healthy, wouldn't you say? And good for body and soul? And shall we also have some decadent ice cream to top off our tiramisu heavenly delight (maybe not as "healthy" but certainly uplifting)?

Looking forward to the evening (hopefully someone could still pass me a copy of said novel on Sunday... I have yet to lay my hands on one...)!

Your hostess: Thea

Questionnaire: Thea

Book Club: First of all, let me say how thrilled I am to have been invited. I hope our association will be a long and enjoyable one!

1) What is your vision for book club?
Book Clubs are a great vehicle for expanding our views, broadening our horizons, reading a variety of books, as well as challenging others to do the same.

2) What do you hope to get out of the club? What do you hope to contribute? I hope to hear other people's views on life's happenings, and hope to share mine from my life's experiences.

3) Suggest one helpful guideline for discussion. Try to stay on topic as much as possible, be open to each other's views, and know when to agree to disagree.

Books:
4) What are a few of your favorite books? I enjoy a variety of genres, such as biographies, some fantasy fiction, historical non-fiction and historical fiction. Authors: Stephen Lawhead, Robert Massie, John Ronald Tolkien, Clive Staples Lewis, George MacDonald, Marian Zimmer Bradley, Thomas Hardy... could list more but these come to mind quickly.

5) How much do you typically read? (for example: # of books/week or month or year) I generally read one or two books a week, depending on my schedule.

6) What is your most commonly read genre? what is your least favorite genre? What genre have you never really read (and maybe always wanted to..) ? I most often read fiction, but that is only because I am librarian of my church library and fiction is the type of book needing a read-through at the moment.

7) What kind of books would you like to read in book club? More of your favorites? Something new? Any specific titles? I would like to experience books that I would not normally be inclined to read, sprinkled with the odd book that I have really enjoyed. Three titles that come to mind are "The Life of Pi" by Yann Martel, or "The Stone Diaries" by Carol Shields, or "The Screwtape Letters" by C.S. Lewis. Has the book club done these yet?

8) What characteristics does a book need to make it a good discussion book? It needs to be generally well-written and have some literary value.

Cooks:
9) Do you like to cook/bake? What are you favorite things to make/eat? On occasion I enjoy cooking and baking. Mostly when I have dinner guests, or around Christmas, when baking is so much of the part of the season.

10) Do you like to experiment with new recipes, ingredients or cooking techniques? Would you like to cook/bake or eat new things in book club? I do not experiment too frequently, but would be amenable to trying.

11) What kind of menus would you like to see in book club? Would you prefer low-effort, simple snacks or more inventive meals? Or some of both? A bit of both would be fun.

12) Give an example of a book that you've read and a dish that you could serve with that book to enhance the experience. Biography of Olga Ivinskaya "Captive of Time". We could serve up saika, or kulich or farfel, all Russian pastries. There are other Russian dishes, but they tend to be heavier meals and soups.